remote cursor only shows if all settings for it are default

[Grizzly(Francis Smit)]

OK both systems are running Ubuntu 21.04 hirsute hippo

$ lsb_release -a
No LSB modules are available.
Distributor ID: Ubuntu
Description: Ubuntu 21.04
Release: 21.04
Codename: hirsute

all packages up to date

2).$ apt-cache policy vinagre
vinagre:
  Installed: 3.22.0-8ubuntu2
  Candidate: 3.22.0-8ubuntu2
  Version table:
 *** 3.22.0-8ubuntu2 500
        500 http://au.archive.ubuntu.com/ubuntu hirsute/universe amd64 Packages
        100 /var/lib/dpkg/status

both are the same on both ends.

3). expected to see a working cursor

4). nothing until I had the bright idea to change the remote systems cursor back to default yaru default size. I had it on Redglass maximum size like the local box.